You Hurt My Feelings...

Power Struggle: "God gave me feelings. Do I just ignore my feeling when someone hurts me? What does the Bible teach about dealing with our feelings?"

Scripture:

 "Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy." Matthew 5:6

Truth Encounter:

Jesus had just spoken to his Followers, telling them that a person who has accepted Him embodies His character. They are poor in Spirit, they mourn, they are meek, and they hunger and thirst after His righteousness. Then Jesus turned his teaching to their behavior. If we choose to Follow Him it will influence our behavior. In today’s scripture Jesus gives us an insight to how we are to deal with our feelings. He says, “Blessed are the merciful, for they will receive mercy.”

What does feeling have to do with mercy? Feelings often determine how people relate to each other. Feelings play a large role in determining if mercy or justice is extended.

Mercy is the act of getting what we do not deserve. We all have experience mercy at some time or another. Some of you may have experienced the sound of the judge’s gavel as a verdict is pronounced. If not, you may have experienced the simultaneous flashing blue light in the rear view mirror and the sound of a patrol car siren, as the patrol officer tells you that you were exceeding the speed limit. You may not have experienced either of these but most of us have been guilty of hurting someone, intentionally or unintentionally, which had the potential of damaging our relationship with them. We either suffer the consequences of our actions or receive mercy instead of justice that could be dealt to us.

Our hope is to receive mercy. However, Jesus is more interested in us extending mercy. Before we can extend mercy to others we must forgive them. Because our feelings are so sensitive, many professing Christians wrestle with forgiveness. However, when we become a child of God the Holy Spirit will produce in us the ability to not only forgive but to extend mercy to those who have wronged us.

If we are not intentional about Following God we will allow our feelings to control our actions instead of the will of God. I must confess that this week I was tempted to extend justice rather than mercy to those who I felt had taken advantage of me. During my worship, the Holy Spirit reminded me of Jesus words from the cross, “Father forgive them, for they know not what they do,” Luke 23:34.

Then other verses came to my mind. Jesus also said, “If you do not forgive others you will not be forgiven,” Matthew 6:15. Paul told us, that God’s grace is sufficient during our times of need,” 2 Corinthians 12:9. I asked forgiveness for my sin, and prayed God would extend mercy to those who I felt has wronged me.

Do you struggle with hurt feeling? What scripture truth can you share with us from God's word that helped you deal with your feelings and those who hurt you? 

Prayer:

Dear Father, Thank you for your mercy to me. Create in me love, kindness, patience, and compassion, and forgiveness, that I might show mercy to those less fortunate than me and to those who have wronged me. And… Father, forgive my avengers for they know not what they do. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.

Romans 1:13-15 WHY WE NEED A BROTHERHOOD?

Even the hardest of individuals understand brotherhood, whether it is the natural brother or a brotherhood by association. We as believers talk about our brothers and sisters in Christ. What does that imply? Who is your brother and sister in Christ?

Scripture:

Romans 1:13 I do not want you to be unaware, brothers that I planned many times to come to you (but have been prevented from doing so until now) in order that I might have a harvest among you, just as I have had among the other Gentiles. 14I am obligated both to Greeks and non-Greeks, both to the wise and the foolish. 15That is why I am so eager to preach the gospel also to you who are at Rome

Lesson:

As we are still in the first chapter of Romans, but I just keep hearing how strong Paul feels about our relationship not only with God the Father but, among us as believers. Here he calls a group of individuals that he has never met, brothers. How can that be? Brother carries with it a connotation of affection one to another. So how do we have that relationship with one that we do not personally know or to someone we have never met?

As believers we have a brother/sister relationship because of our relationship to the heavenly father and not because we agree with, look alike, or act alike.  As believers we are members of the family of God, therefore all differences should be forsaken. Why? Not for the sake of brotherhood but for the sake of the gospel of Christ. While brotherhood is so important, the result is that a harvest is among us when the gospel is preached. There is a direct relation between a harvest and the condition of the body of Christ. If the body (church) is not healthy, it cannot reproduce.

Application:

1.   Who is your brother/sister in Christ? How do you relate to them?

2.   Is your attitude to other brothers and sisters in Christ so that you are willing to do whatever you need to do for a harvest to take place in the kingdom?

3.   Are there things (hurt feelings, envy, jealously, unforgiveness, pride, etc.) that keep you from relating to your brothers and sisters in Christ that you need to get rid of? Name it and get rid of it now.

4.   What does harvest imply? When we plant a seed what do we expect?

5.   How eager are you to carry the gospel to others or are you caught up in the things that would bring disharmony among you and other believers?

Prayer:

Dear Father, help me to love your children the way a father wants his children to love each other. Forgive me and remove from me any unloving attitudes or feeling that are not of you. Lead me in such relationships that would lead others to know you. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.

Are you Marked as a Lover?

       Do you believe that we are being marked? I know we have been hearing stuff like that a long time. And yes I know that there are those out there that know more about us than we care for them too. But I am not talking about the world of technology, and how much information is being stored about us. And yet who knows for sure. For all out of our mouth flows the content of our heart. Hum...So what if someone out there is really taking note of what we say, "written," to know who we really are, whose side we are on. 

       In the old testament book of Ezekiel (chapters 9-12), God said, "Go throughout the city of Jerusalem and put a mark on the foreheads of those who grieve and lament over the detestable things that are done in it." We are living among a rebellious people. They have eyes to see, and ears to hear but they do neither for they are a rebellious people."  A mark was put on the forehead of those grieving over the detestable things that were being done so that they might be spared from death.

        In the new testament, Jesus says, in John 13:34,35,  "A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another". In John 17:21 Jesus is praying to the Father "that they all may be one; even as Thou, Father, art in Me, and I in Thee, that they also may be in Us; that the world may believe that Thou didst send Me". 

          Yes, we are marked.  I once heard that we "preach" our own funerals. It is the, - dash - between out birth and death dates. Wonder if there is enough evidence in our lives to convict us of being a lover? We are to be a lover of people. Listen to this. We either love and love all, or we do not love, meaning we pick and choose who, when, and where, and why to share love. 

          The true mark? You know I was in the YMCA this past week. As soon as I walked through the door, I spotted a person who had done me wrong years ago. And while I was not exactly eye-to-eye with the person, our eyes met. Yes, I did the "Christian thing" I spoke to her. Was it with the voice of forgiveness and love? Not exactly, for I just did the least I could do, I just spoke, but in my heart, I realized I still have some work to do, for sometimes, my love is quite conditional. Love, is our mark, and we are to share love, unconditionally. Do you love as Christ did? This is the true mark of a "Christian." Lord, I want to be marked with your love. I want to be red with guilt. I love you, my friends.

        

How to Make It

I received this little poem in my e-mail this morning.

"There comes a point in your life when you realize:
Who matters,
Who never did,
Who won't anymore...
And who always will..
So, don't worry about people from your past ,
there's a reason why they didn't make it to your future.."

Names quickly appear across the pages of my mind as I read this. Yes, there are reasons that people from our past do not make it into our future. We make decisions about people concerning whether we remember or forget them based on whether our relationship with them was/is "good," or "bad."

Have you ever heard someone say, "I will forgive, but not forget?" I believe that forgive means, as though it didn't happen, or in other words, FORGET IT, let it BE GONE.  I do forgive individuals, but as hard as I try there are times when that individual, that I thought I left behind, that caused me pain,  just pops back up. How about you? Then, once again, I must deal with my feelings. 

You know, everytime, yes, everytime I deal with this, the Holy Spirit reminds me of Joseph when he was dealing with his brothers after they had hurt him so deeply.   Listen to this passage from Genesis 50:19-21, when Joseph told his brothers, "Don't be afraid. Am I in the place of God? You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is not being done, the saving of many lives... and he spoke kindly to them."

I believe that attitude of Joseph is what Christ had in mind when he said for us to "consider it pure joy...when we face trials...."So I am saying I am to fake the hurt during my trials and appear "happy as a Lark," even though I am crushed on the inside? Definitely not.  Trials are painful, at least mine are, but I am saying that it is possible to have a positive attitude (joy) because we know that trials produce in us perseverance, patience, and steadfastness (James 1: 2-15). 

As believers in God we should  try to look at our struggles as an opportunity for growth. As we pray, God will give us strength and wisdom to get through the difficult times and as in the passage today, to not just get past those difficult persons, but be able to look them in the eye and "speak kindly to them." Instead of looking at that individual and saying, "You caused me hurt in my life," look to God and say, "Thank you for using the hurt to accomplish your will in my life." 

James 1: 12 says, "Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him." 

How do you see those that hurt you or someone you love. How do you deal with hurt...tough times? Did you become better or bitter? Will you receive the crown?